What Is Narcissism and How Can You Spot a Narcissist
Filed under: Archives, Being Safe, Great Books, Helping Others, Worth Reading
Many of you made heard of narcissists or narcissistic behavior and may ask, “What is narcissism?”, “How can I spot a narcissist?” or, “How can I avoid a narcissist?”
When you know what to look for, you may realize you’re either living with a narcissist, working with one, or may have a parent who exhibited narcissistic behaviors.
Narcissism in not gender specific and although it is not always easy to spot a narcissist, here are a few instances where you may have been dealing with a narcissist and didn’t know it:
If you
• have worked with a demanding boss who made you feel inadequate
• were raised by a domineering parent who had to be right about everything
• dated someone who demanded lots of emotional maintenance but rarely reciprocated
• had family members who challenged and criticized incessantly
• were friends with someone who seemed to require you walk on eggshells around them,
you were more than likely dealing with a narcissist.
Lori Hoeck, of Think Like a Black Belt, and I have written “The Narcissist: A User’s Guide ” to help you understand why a narcissist would be seeking to prey upon you. We’ve gathered stories that illustrate the bewildering ways a narcissist will manipulate circumstances to blame you for everything and make you believe it. You’ll be able to see how a narcissist will use your weak points and words against you for control in the relationship. But more importantly, this e-book is going to help you fight your way out of a harmful situation.
Most people enter adulthood with a fair amount of naïveté. Seeking love and acceptance, they may put up with bad behavior from others. Many will seek approval from their peers or look for an authoritative mentor. Some will think they can change a difficult person with loving kindness. All of these circumstances can be more dangerous than a run-of-the-mill encounter might first suggest. They all signify potential for exploitation to a narcissist.
Narcissists can present themselves in almost any venue. Their method of building themselves up at the expense of others is, paradoxically, rooted in their own low self-esteem. Somewhere, at a very young age, a narcissist begins to think that he or she is inferior to others. That inferiority complex morphs into an ever-increasing need to validate themselves. They do this by putting you down. The lower you are in the pecking order, the higher they can be by comparison. If you buy into the false scenario they’ve constructed, they’ll continue. The process depletes you and feeds them. They are emotional vampires.
The more Lori and I observed and studied narcissistic behavior, the more we realized how prevalent it is. Even if you’ve never dealt with a narcissist, chances are you may know someone who has, or who is currently battling this toxic dynamic. Curiously, though, there are few resources to obtain help, and many of those are more suitable for medical professionals, psychotherapists and counselors.
We know our concise User’s Guide, which turns the tables on the toxic dynamic, can provide needed information and hope.
We’re making the e-book available for free download so that it can easily get to anyone who might benefit.
Defending against a narcissist and leaving the relationship may be the most difficult things someone may face. The most important thing we can do for someone who is involved in a narcissistic relationship is offer support and a respite from the dysfunction. The Narcissist: A User’s Guide provides encouragement, strategies and tips that can be implemented to neutralize and, ultimately, negate a narcissist’s influence.
Download your free copy of “The Narcissist” here.
The Narcissist: A User’s Guide is on Facebook here and on Squidoo here.
This post was written by Betsy Wuebker, author of “Passing Thru” (the blog) and co-author of “The Narcissist” (the free ebook)
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How To Prepare for Disaster
Filed under: Archives, At Home, At Work, Being Safe
Natural and man made disasters can strike at any time. Are you prepared for a catastrophic event?
In preparation for a home disaster, here’s a tip.
This will be a time consuming process, however, if disaster strikes, you will have more time to concentrate on getting your family to safety, quickly.
Make copies of the following, and if applicable, list all contact information for each:
1) Photos. Copy old photos, and make copies of those that are on your hard drive
2) Insurance policies-home, health, business, and/or life
3) Mortgage and/or deed
4) Will, power of attorney, living orders, and/or trusts
5) Investment portfolio(s) and/or retirement plans
6) Accounting data for home or business use, that may be on your hard drive only
7) Tax Returns
8.) Bank account information
9) Debt obligations, including account numbers and due dates
10) Passports
11) Social Security card(s)
12) Keep in mind, some insurance companies want to see photos of the actual inventory of your home. Make time to take photos, or video tape a complete inventory of your possessions.
13) Birth Certificate(s)
14) Marriage Certificate(s)
15) Titles for vehicle(s)
16) Military record(s)
17) Names and phone numbers for all relatives and friends
18) Attorney(s)
19) Accountant(s)
20) Business interests, and contracts
21) Real estate interests, in addition to your primary residence
22) Medical information, including doctor’s names, and a list of your prescriptions and pharmacy(s)
23) Drivers Licencse(s)
24) Additional documents you deem important
Keep a copies of all of these documents and photos at a safe, separate location, away from your home. Most banks offer a safety deposit box, oftentimes for a modest fee. You may also consider investing in a fire proof box, or small safe. Remember to protect your identity in this process.
In the event your home experiences a disaster, such as a fire, flood, or hurricane, your important documents will be preserved.
For more information on emergency preparedness, in the event of a natural or man made disaster, check out FEMA’s (Federal Emergency Management Agency) website. It is filled with tons of valuable information.
No tags for this post.Fishing or Phishing, It Is A Scam
It is pronounced “fishing”, but it is spelled phishing. Fishing, or phishing, is a scam.
You may get an email from who you believe is your bank, or PayPal, or another financial institution. The email states that your information or account needs to be updated. If you click on the email, it will take you to a site that looks like that of your financial institution. You will be asked to log in, by using your private log in information. Don’t go fishing (or phishing). If you do, it could be the beginning, of financial ruin for you.
I have found a great website that explains phishing in great detail. It also includes “snapshots” of how the a phishing screen may look.
Ian Denny, of Multi Solutions, an IT company, explains, in detail, how this scam works.
His company “took the bait” and went “phishing”, by following those links. Where it took them, is quite interesting.
Please be aware, if you do online banking. most likely, your bank will never send you an email. If you are uncertain, call the bank. If the email contains a telephone number, do not use it. Get the telephone number for customer service out of your telephone book.
For additional tips on how to protect your identity, read……..Protecting Your Identity, Identity Theft and Check Writing, and my Product Review for a cross cut shredder
It’s one thing to go fishing, but don’t go phishing.
Protecting Your Identity
Filed under: Archives, At Home, At Work, Being Safe, Finances
Earlier I wrote a post, titled: Identity Theft – Check Writing. In that article, I recommended using Uniball Signo 207 (anti check washing) pens.
Today, I witnessed another way to protect your identity.
I went to the post office to mail some letters. When I drove up to the “drive up” mail boxes, I noticed that one was literally overflowing with mail. Fortunately, there were three boxes, so I deposited my mail in one of the other boxes.
Unscrupulous individuals could easily steal mail out of overflowing mail boxes. After all, they don’t think twice before stealing mail out of mailboxes on the side of the road. With stolen mail, you could very easily, not only have your identity stolen, but also have your checking account wiped out.
I don’t know much about check washing, but I do know it happens a lot. I don’t know how someone can steal your identity, but I know it’s becoming a huge issue.
The next time you are at the post office, and some, or all of the drive up mail boxes are full. Take the time to go inside of the post office, to deposit your mail.
A few minutes spent depositing your mail in a safe place, could save you from months (or years) of fighting to get your identity back.
No tags for this post.Life Saving Tips
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